Pentecost IX 2008
Fr. Joseph Scalisi
Have you ever felt like a failure? Like you had done something or failed to do something that disappointed someone or disappointed yourself? Maybe there was something you could have done to prevent what happened…or maybe it was completely beyond your control…but for whatever reason, you feel as though you failed in some important way.
I’m sure that, for most of us, it would not take long to recall such a time. In fact, when I began to read this weeks readings just such a time came to my mind.
I’ve spoken, on a number of occasions, about my time of service in Tanzania, on the east coast of Africa. I was there to serve a term of two years; however, I was there for only six months as a result of numerous and persistent illnesses. Taking crowded vans and walking great distances to the hospital nearly every week only seemed to make it worse, until it became apparent that I would have to make a difficult choice.
While I must admit that the desire to return home was strong, to see family and friends and to get some proper medical care for my increasingly frustrating condition, I also felt obligated to stay. I had made a commitment for two years and I wanted to keep it. Besides, God had worked very visibly and powerfully just to get me there. If I left, I would fail….I would fail myself…I would fail God.
I spent a great deal of time praying about what I should do; meanwhile, the same scripture passage kept appearing in various ways over the ensuing weeks. That passage, which has become one of my favorites can be found in our first reading for today: “For as the rain and snow come down from heaven, and return not thither but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes forth from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose and prosper in the thing for which I sent it.”
Eventually, the decision was made for me to return home to seek medical treatment. I felt defeated…and I carried that burden around with me for some time. However, I began to discover that, as a result of my early return, events were set in motion that are still bearing fruit today. It has never ceased to amaze me that, as a result of what I believed to be my greatest failure, God brought about my heart’s desire, brought me closer to him, renewed my calling, and allowed me to be an instrument of his that I could not have been done if I had stayed. In fact, I stand before you now as a result of what I had originally judged to be a failure.
So I ask you again…have you ever felt like a failure?
We hear that God’s word is living and active. It does not return empty, but it shall accomplish that which he purposes and prospers in the thing for which he sent it.
And this brings about a contrast that many of us do not stop long enough to think about…who are we really living for anyway. Are we living for ourselves or are we living for God?
To live for ourselves is to act in ways that will give us the things we want and the belief that things should turn out the way we want if we just work hard enough. We judge the success or failure of our life based on if we have obtained those things or not. This is why I felt like a failure, because I failed to complete what I thought was the goal.
On the other hand, to live for God is to hold an entirely different standard. It is not measured by things obtained but by relationships developed. It is marked by an attitude of peace even as the walls seem to fall down around us because our hope is in God not in the walls. It also means that we recognize that things do not always work out the way we want them to or think they should…and it has nothing to do with how much work we put into it. But we still have hope because scripture says in Romans 8:28 we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
And this brings us to the parable of the seed and the soil in today’s gospel. Since our Lord has already given us the explanation of the seed and the different types of soil, I will only address it in summary since I certainly cannot improve upon it.
Of the four types he mentions, the path is when the seed simply sits there because what it contains is not understood and it is taken away. The rocky ground is someone who likes what he hears but does not have the discipline to sustain any growth, for to develop any relationship it takes time and effort. The thorns are those that hear the word but they’ve got too many other things to do. Their heart is set on other things, so the seed is crowded out among so many of them. And finally the good soil is one that hears the message and understands its importance.
Notice that the four different types of soil do not have a say in what the seed grows into. The soil simply receives it or not. So if the seed is the word of the kingdom of God it will grow in the hearts of its hearers if it is received. And it will grow into what God wants it to grow into because the seed of the Kingdom has its own purpose. To be the good soil does not mean that you need a doctorate in theology or to spend half your life in the mission fields. It means a desire to be open to God, both in his discipline and in his direction for your life.
How can you tell what type of soil you are? Well, let’s take this test. If we substitute the words “God’s desire and his call on your life” for the word “seed”, answer this question. During this Eucharistic celebration so far, the prayers, the hymns, the readings, and now the sermon, what have you been thinking about most? Has it been the items listed in the bulletin? Has it been thinking about how you will spend the remainder of your Sunday? Has it been worrying about things that have happened during this last week? Or is it waiting and hoping to hear something from the Lord? He is always throwing out seed, how are you receiving it? If it is not the latter, it is not too late. It’s never too late. He who has ears, let him hear.